Check out my Q&A with journalist Maja Beckstrom from Twin Cities Pioneer Press:
Q. What did you expect life would be like after becoming a mother?
A. I expected I would be able to continue my career. I was a manager of training and development for Earthlink. And, like a lot of women, I expected my husband and I would share parenting and family responsibilities. But I got turned down for a bid to go part time and then lost another job. Suddenly, I had no job, and my husband, an attorney on a partnership track, was working 70 hours a week. We felt we were very enlightened, but when it came down to it, we still had a lot of subconscious assumptions — basically that mothers are responsible for kids and fathers are clueless, even though that’s never what we would have said out loud.
Q. You write about your growing resentment toward your husband. He’d sit and watch TV at the end of the day with a pile of unfolded laundry at his feet.
A. If you get 10 mothers together for drinks, inevitably the talk turns to who is doing what at home, he’s not doing enough, and how do I get him to do more. But it’s a conversation that rarely bears fruit. We don’t know what to do about it. No one knows how to solve it.