Category Archives: Holidays

Creating a Family Vision: Part 2

In “Creating a Family Vision” I described how my husband, daughter and I spent part of our vacation in January creating vision board collages.  We each thought about the day of our daughter’s high school graduation and then collected magazine images that reflected our feelings and dreams for our family. As promised, here’s what we did next.

After we’d shared our vision board collages, we ate dinner and then returned to the magazine-covered floor to continue creating a family vision.

We reviewed the list of words we’d written down as each of us talked about our vision board collages. Bold, over the top, party, humor, joy, travel, contentment…

“Our next step,” I said, “is to brainstorm how we would finish these three sentences.”

  • We are…
  • We believe…
  • We want…

“We are…” is what makes our family unique.

“We believe…” is what we believe in and value.

“We want…” is what we want for our family over the next 8 years.

“So let’s start with ‘We are…’ What makes us unique?” I asked.

“We do vision boards,” my husband deadpanned. Continue reading

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Filed under Holidays, Marriage, Recommendations, Remodeling Motherhood Tips

Father’s Day Gift: “Home Game” by Michael Lewis

Looking for a Father’s Day gift? My husband and I both recommend Home Game: An Accidental Guide to Fatherhood by Michael Lewis – author of The Blind Side and most recently The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine.

Home Game: An Accidental Guide to Fatherhood chronicles Lewis’ experience following the birth of each of his three children. In the process of telling great stories that are often laugh-out-loud funny, he also provides a commentary on modern fatherhood and parenthood that is sure to resonate with many men. For my husband and I the book also sparked great conversations as he shared bits with me that made him laugh or reflected his own feelings.  Continue reading

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Filed under Book Review, Fatherhood, Holidays, Motherhood, Recommendations, Remodeling Motherhood

Special Mother’s Day Offer!

Mother’s Day is almost here and what better gift then a copy of my new Los Angeles Times Best-Selling book, This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today. This is the perfect gift for any mother, no matter the age of her children, and even for your own mother! Read an excerpt now to see why.

And just for this Mother’s Day season, purchase a book for yourself or a friend and I’ll send you the link to download my FREE guide to making Mother’s Day Resolutions. Mother’s Day Resolutions are small steps you resolve to take to remodel motherhood for yourself AND to remodel the world around you so it works better for mothers, fathers and families.

My book also makes a perfect book club read for the months of May and June. Purchase 3 or more copies for your book club and I’ll send you the link to the FREE book club guide AND mail you  personalized autographed bookplates to insert into each book.

Pick-up your copies of This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today then email your receipt by April 28 to:

specialoffer AT remodelingmotherhood DOT com

or use the Contact Form to let me know. (For a book club, be sure to include the names I’ll need to personalize the bookplates.)

Tweet This or Share on Facebook now to let others know about this fabulous Mother’s Day Offer!

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Filed under Announcements, Holidays, Motherhood, Promotion, Remodeling Motherhood

Special Holiday Offer!

The holidays are here and I know mothers and families are busier then ever!  And I bet you have lots of mothers to buy gifts for, right?  Well what better gift then a copy of my new book, This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today. The book would make a perfect gift for any mother, no matter the age of her children, and even your own mother!

And just for the special holiday season, purchase 3 or more copies and I’ll send you personalized autographed bookplates to insert into each for FREE.  In addition, I’ll send over a FREE downloadable podcast of the Remodeling Motherhood masterclass which you can share with all the mothers you know.

Pick-up your copies of This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today and send in your receipt by DECEMBER 16th to specialoffer@remodelingmotherhood.com with the names you’d like written on the bookplates.

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Filed under Announcements, Holidays, Promotion

Home for the Holidays – A Celebration of the Heart with a Gift from the Soul

I’ll be on the BlogTalk Radio Show, FMMK Talk Radio, next Tuesday, December 8th at 8 am Pacific/10 am Central. Please be sure to tune in a listen! Click below for more information:

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Filed under Announcements, Holidays, Interview, Radio

Remodeling Motherhood to Enjoy the Holidays

I am entering the holiday season feeling particularly grateful this year. Since the October 6 release of my book, This is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today,  so many people have been so good to me that I get choked up just thinking about it.

As I travel and fit book related activities in around my job, both my husband and daughter have put up with my absences and demands on my time, plus my husband has taken on the bulk of the family work and daily logistics. The people I met on my travels  let me sleep in their homes, bought me dinner, picked me up at the train station, dropped me off at bookstores, sent out press releases and called on friends to come out and see me, and even gave ME gifts for coming to visit when they were the ones who put in all the work to make it happen.

This busy period of my life foreshadows the craziness many of us feel as we enter the holiday season. Plus, the holiday season often kicks a couple of my outdated assumptions, or mental maps,  into high gear:

  • Mother is responsible for and naturally better at caring for family and home.
  • Mothers who pursue personal fulfillment are selfish.

I know that even before Thanksgiving, I’m already starting to think about good gifts for our daughter, which holiday rituals we can fit in when, what favorite foods to have for special days because that’s what a “good mother” would do. Yet my husband probably isn’t. I know that with my to-do list longer than usual,  I am likely to try to manage every minute of every day more closely and set aside taking care of myself. I know that I am less likely to ask others for help because I assume they must be busy too. Fortunately, the last eight weeks have reinforced for me a few Remodeling Motherhood tips that I think are especially important for all of us to remember during the holiday season.

ASK FOR HELP

When I talk with groups about how outdated assumptions keep mothers from taking time for themselves or asking for help,  I often pose this question to the group, “So if a friend called you tomorrow and said I need to (go to a professional networking event/have an hour to myself/fill in the blank), can you watch my kids for a couple hours, how many of you would do it?” Of course, every hand  in the room goes up. Then I ask, “And how many of you have ever asked?” Usually only a hand or two goes up. We think it’s not okay to ask, that we’ll be adding to the burden of someone else, that we ought to be able to do it all on our own. I learned once again on my trip that it is okay for me to ask and that I couldn’t do it on my own. Perhaps more importantly, I was also reminded that the person providing help feels fulfilled and energized, and that asking and receiving help creates rich connections between people.  So this holiday season, ask.

MANAGE ENERGY NOT TIME

This busy period in my life also reminded me that managing energy is more important that managing the minutes of every day. As I made my way through my whirlwind schedule, always having more to do than the minutes in the day, I made time for exercise and getting enough sleep. I knew those two things would give me the energy I needed to both get things done and enjoy them as they were happening. So ask yourself, what gives you energy and how will you make room for those activities during this busy time?

SHARE RESPONSIBILITY

I’ve also realized it is time for my husband and I to talk about who would do what for the holidays. I’ve already begun in my head to take on responsibility for the perfect holiday. Unless we talk about it, I’ll assume that as the “good mother” I have responsibility for the gifts, the food, the rituals, the calendar. I know if I continue down this path without pausing for us to get on the same page, I’ll get so tired and resentful that I won’t enjoy the season myself and no one will enjoy me!  Plus, I’ll rob my husband of the chance to share the responsibility.  So it’s time for us to talk about what we want the holiday season to be like, what’s important to our family, and how we’ll share responsibility for making it what we want.

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Filed under Articles, Assumptions about Mothers, Family Work, Holidays, Kids & School, Remodeling Motherhood, Remodeling Motherhood Tips